Mark Twain’s Hilarious and Heartfelt Dog Quotes

Introduction:

Mark Twain, the iconic American author, was not only celebrated for his sharp wit but also for his love of dogs. 

In this compilation, we delve into over 80+ quotes by Mark Twain that beautifully capture the essence of dogs, from their endearing loyalty to their comical quirks. 

Join us on this journey through Twain’s humor and heartfelt observations about our four-legged companions.

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30+ Mark Twain Quotes about Dogs:

1. “Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.” – Mark Twain
2. “The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.” – Mark Twain
3. “If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.” – Mark Twain
4. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
5. “The dog is willing.” – Mark Twain
6. “The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs.” – Mark Twain
7. “To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.” – Mark Twain
8. “I have read my books by the light of my own glowing tail, I have seen the mouse’s home under the rich cheese of the pantry floor; I have been a watchman in the woodpile, as bright and quick as my cousin Tom’s best barlow, and have been shunned and hated by the whole establishment, and, I tell you, it has spoiled my night’s sleep many a time.” – Mark Twain
9. “The dog was created especially for children. He is a god of frolic.” – Mark Twain
10. “It is just like man’s vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions.” – Mark Twain
11. “My dog is a gentleman. I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
12. “The dog is a yes-animal. Very popular with people who can’t afford a yes man.” – Mark Twain
13. “The more I know about people, the better I like my dog.” – Mark Twain
14. “Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain at one end you lose at the other. It’s like feeding a dog on his own tail. It won’t fatten the dog.” – Mark Twain
15. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
16. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
17. “Such short little lives our pets have to spend with us, and they spend most of it waiting for us to come home each day.” – Mark Twain
18. “He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.” – Mark Twain
19. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
20. “If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.” – Mark Twain
21. “The dog was created especially for children. He is the god of frolic.” – Mark Twain
22. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
23. “It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Mark Twain
24. “Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.” – Mark Twain
25. “What counts is not necessarily the size of the dog in the fight; it’s the size of the fight in the dog.” – Mark Twain
26. “The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven, not man’s.” – Mark Twain
27. “Dogs are better than human beings because they know but do not tell.” – Mark Twain
28. “I have no doubt that it is a part of the destiny of the human race, in its gradual improvement, to leave off eating animals, as surely as the savage tribes have left off eating each other when they came in contact with the more civilized.” – Mark Twain
29. “To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.” – Mark Twain
30. “Don’t accept your dog’s admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful.” – Mark Twain

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30+ Quotes about The Endearing Qualities of Dogs:

31. “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” – Josh Billings
32. “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras
33. “Happiness is a warm puppy.” – Charles M. Schulz
34. “The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated.” – Mahatma Gandhi
35. “Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen.” – Orhan Pamuk
36. “Dogs are like that, lives are more important to them than they are to themselves.” – Megan Lindholm
37. “The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.” – Charles de Gaulle
38. “There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog.” – Konrad Lorenz
39. “The world would be a nicer place if everyone had the ability to love as unconditionally as a dog.” – M.K. Clinton
40. “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras
41. “A dog is the only thing that can mend a crack in your broken heart.” – Judy Desmond
42. “To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs.” – Aldous Huxley
43. “A dog will teach you unconditional love. If you can have that in your life, things won’t be too bad.” – Robert Wagner
44. “Dogs have a way of finding the people who need them and filling an emptiness we didn’t ever know we had.” – Thom Jones
45. “A dog is the only thing that can mend a crack in your broken heart.” – Judy Desmond
46. “The bond with a true dog is as lasting as the ties of this earth will ever be.” – Konrad Lorenz
47. “A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself.” – Josh Billings
48. “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras
49. “Dogs have a way of finding the people who need them and filling an emptiness we didn’t ever know we had.” – Thom Jones
50. “A dog is the only thing that can mend a crack in your broken heart.” – Judy Desmond
51. “The bond with a true dog is as lasting as the ties of this earth will ever be.” – Konrad Lorenz
52. “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras
53. “Happiness is a warm puppy.” – Charles M. Schulz
54. “The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated.” – Mahatma Gandhi
55. “Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen.” – Orhan Pamuk
56. “Dogs are like that, lives are more important to them than they are to themselves.” – Megan Lindholm
57. “The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.” – Charles de Gaulle
58. “There is no faith which has never yet been broken, except that of a truly faithful dog.” – Konrad Lorenz
59. “The world would be a nicer place if everyone had the ability to love as unconditionally as a dog.” – M.K. Clinton
60. “Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole.” – Roger Caras

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30+ Quotes on Dogs as Characters in Twain’s Works:

61. “Jim was most ruined for a servant because he got stuck up on account of having seen the devil and been rode by witches.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn”
62. “I reckon I got to light out for the territory ahead of the rest, because Aunt Sally, she’s going to adopt me and sivilize me and I can’t stand it. I been there before.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn”
63. “Then they all stuck a pin in their fingers to get blood to sign with, and I made up mine in a glass with gin.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn”
64. “Aunt Polly, she’s kind of old, and tired, and peevish-like, by the by that’s the way of women folks sometimes.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer”
65. “I felt so lonesome I most wished I was dead.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn”
66. “She never licks anybody – whacks ’em over the head with her thimble.” – Mark Twain, “The Adventures of Tom Sawyer”
67. “The good book says, ‘Judge not, lest ye be judged.’ Judge not, my friend. Do not judge.” – Mark Twain, “The Mysterious Stranger”
68. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
69. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
70. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
71. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
72. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
73. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
74. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
75. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
76. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
77. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
78. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
79. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
80. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
81. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
82. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
83. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
84. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
85. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
86. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
87. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
88. “A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
89. “You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”
90. “All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.” – Mark Twain, “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”

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Conclusion:

Mark Twain’s quotes about dogs are more than just witty remarks; they offer profound insights into human nature and the unbreakable bond between humans and their furry friends. 

These quotes continue to resonate with readers, reminding us of the timeless appeal of both Twain’s writing and the companionship of dogs.

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